DaveZdyrko.com

I’m not sure if the show is on anymore, but Beauty & the Geek used to be one of my many reality TV guilty pleasures. I’d watch and make fun of it religiously with my roommies at the time and it was one of the shows I’d look forward to each and every week. In addition to the obvious comedic element it brought to my life, it also was worth watching for the plethora of Spank Bank™ material it introduced.

One such bringer of wet dream fodder was season four’s Amanda Hanshaw. She didn’t last on the show that long, but it was enough of an appearance to get her recognized by me and lesser known entities such as Playboy, where she became a Cyber Girl of the Week and managed to do what seems like a few thousand pictorials. And while it may seem a long overdue, she has now been honored as my Babe of the Week.

I’m actually quite reluctant to name Megan Hauserman my latest Babe of the Week because she’s probably the least attractive girl I’ve ever bestowed this honor. Hell, despite my general horniness and desperation, if I had sex with her she’d be by far the least attractive girl I’ve ever boned. Her face is just frightful and she always looks like she’s trying to pinch off a loaf. All that said, she does have an immensely hot body and I would have no problem banging the hell out of her with a paper bag covering her face. We’ll leave it at that.

I didn’t think anyone else watched the same crap that I do, but apparently other people out there are entertained by the same worthless television that I am. People actually get joy out of watching stupid bitches on shows like Rock of Love 2 and Beauty & the Geek. I thought I was one of the few. Or maybe I am and the other five or six others just happen to read my blog, as well as watch these types of shows. Hmmm, that actually makes a lot of sense. Anyway, here’s a special “Dear Dave” where you’ll find nekkies of some of your Rock of Love 2 and Beauty & the Geek whores that have nekkies out on the interweb. Contact me if you want to be included in future updates. Oh, and it’s NSFW because I’m too lazy to mosaic out the naughties.

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The lovely Leticia Cline is this week’s Babe of the Week honoree, but I’m not going to use this space to talk about how great she looks or how much I’d love to Russian her before nutting in her face. I’m just here to bitch about how my web host is so damn fucking slow these days.

It’s been a prison rape painful to upload and update for the past month or so. It’s just beyond ridiculous. It used to take me less than a minute to update a regular post and maybe three to five minutes to do a Babe update, but now the regular shit is taking 10 minutes and today’s Babe update took 56 minutes. Nearly a fucking hour to do something that’s normally less than five minutes.

I watch a lot of really stupid shows and despite me knowing they’re stupid, I keep watching. I assume it’s just out of habit or maybe it’s some sick sadomasochist reason. First, there’s America’s Next Top Model. You could say that I watch it for the hot chicks but if you said that you’ve never seen an episode of the show. Each cycle there’s maybe 1-3 bangable bitches compared to the 9+ hideous monstrosities. And in all but maybe one or two of the seasons, one of the hideous monstrosities usually came out on top. This year, some black chick that looks more manly than most of the transvestites you come across in San Francisco, somehow keeps making it though. It pisses me off, yet I still watch.

Then there’s Big Brother 9. I also swore off watching this show after last year’s retarded finale with Dick & Danielle as the final two that I didn’t even bother watching. I decided to give it another shot, but it’s proven to be the worst season of the show ever. CBS tried to go with a younger hotter cast, but all the chicks on the show are butter and just about every single cast member is a complete idiot. They don’t understand strategy and a few of them have made the dumbest decisions in Big Brother history.

My last rant will be about Beauty & the Geek. I understand that they’ve always taken huge liberties with the “beauties” as they’ve mostly just been dumb whores more so than actual beautiful woman.  But the big black woman on it is less of a beauty than I am and most likely some Flavor of Love reject. It shouldn’t, but it angers me that she’s on the show as a beauty. Kind of like how it pisses me off every time the Poison dude refers to the Rock of Love trash as beautiful women. It’s just not even close to true in 90% of the cases. Nevertheless, I watch and somehow enjoy this crap despite the fact that watching usually leaves me angered.