I may have put my initial backing behind another girl, but I won’t lose any sleep if Stevie Lynn ends up winning Maxim’s Hometown Hotties contest for 2009. The truth is that they’re both quite worthy of starring in your own personal in-brain pornographic movies or imaginary relationships, depending on whatever tends to float your boat. Either way, Stevie is a straight dime and gets to add a Babe of the Week to her resume regardless of whether or not she finishes atop the “other” contest.

Alright, so maybe there isn’t a Presidential election right now, but my newest Babe of the Week and current babe I’m crushing on on pleasuring myself hourly to, Leslie Kay Neslon, could use your vote. She’s one of the finalists in Maxim’s Hometown Hotties 2009 and she’s most-deserving of a victory considering my infatuation. Do your part and vote for her! Meanwhile, help me find a tissue, sock, t-shirt or wash cloth that isn’t already stiff and crusty…

As if we even needed more proof that Hugh Hefner is a God among men, he had to go ahead and add a couple of hot 19 year old blonde twins to his stable of bitches to slam home the point even more. Despite getting up there in years, Hef still manages to see more twat than your average gynecologist — and a much higher standard of twat than what the typical gynecologist likely sees.

Anyway, he’s the man and his newest girlfriends, Karissa and Kristina Shannon are the latest additions to my Babe of the Week. I hope you enjoy them as much as I have, albeit it won’t likely be as much as Hef current is. Oh, well, we all can’t be God.

The best thing about watching Gossip Girl is that it typically offers good fodder for the Spank Bank™. I’ve already showcased one of the show’s many fine actresses (the underage one, obviously) and now I’m posting a second as my Babe of the Week.

This week’s special is the 5′10″ blonde beauty that goes by the name of Blake Lively. She’s a mad hot girl with some wicked long legs and is hella bangable.

I’m not sure if it’s his wife or a child he produced with his hot wife, but if the out-of-this-world stunning Stacy Keibler is in any way related to the Keibler Elf; that that little dude is one stone cold pimp. She’s without question one of the finest specimens of what human females have to offer and is unequestionably one of the sexiest Babe of the Week beauties that have yet been featured on this site. In case I haven’t gotten my point across — I’m infatuated with this girl and would give up 10 years on the end of my life for one night with her. Satan, you listening?

I’m keeping this uber short because I’ve been super occupied with work and having my girl Lauralyn in town — The lovely Holly Weber is this week’s Babe of the Week!

For the past couple of weeks, my commute to work has often been accompanied by Taylor Swift’s Love Song on repeat for most of the trip, with the occasional switch to the Al Pacino speech in Any Given Sunday or that T.I. and Rihanna song. Yeah, don’t ask me why. I have issues, that’s a given.

Anyway, I mention this only because I think Taylor Swift is gorgeous and she just looks like the kind of girl that would be fun corrupting sexually because she looks so innocent and sweet. I also think she’s very talented, but let’s be honest here, talent has never really been a qualification for Babe of the Week. That is, unless you count making my dick hard a talent. (For the record, it’s not. The thing gets hard for just about anything.)

For a fairly attractive girl, my latest Babe of the Week doesn’t have the prettiest of names. If one of my boys came up to me and told me he was dating a girl named Agnes Bruckner, the first thing I’d say would be some kind of a GILF joke. Let’s be honest here, hot girls just aren’t named Agnes. That name is more befitting your grandmother or great aunt. It’s not meant for a young piece of ass with a tight little body and nipples that are always seemingly saying “hello world! look at me!”

Nevertheless, Agnes Brucker is a hot young actress and despite her name she’s someone I’d gladly tell my friends I was dating or just banging on the side for fun. I just hope that she’ll eventually learn to take a hint from her pokies, which obviously want attention, to start doing nude scenes to show off all the goods.

Disney, a company obviously in the market of selling sex to the world, has already brought us fine young jailbait in the form of Miley Hannah Cyrus Montana and Selena Gomez (as well as many others in the past that have long since reached adulthood). However, there’s no sign of the whore train stopping anytime soon as there’s plenty more in Mickey’s stable. One such cutie is the singer, songwriter and actress Demi Lovato.

She sings, dances, acts and most likely whores around like everyone else her age or older. But, then again, maybe not. Who knows and who really cares? I know I don’t. All that matters is that she’s a cutie and she’s this week’s Babe of the Week.

A few weeks ago while experiencing the nightly case of insomnia (sleep is for the weak!), I happened upon some movie on HBO called Survival Island. The movie was pretty crap, but it kept me interested based solely on the fact that its starring actress, Kelly Brook, was off the charts sexy.

This beautiful British babe has a very cute face and the most amazing breastissess that I’ve ever witnessed and she spent the entire movie either in some super skimpy bikini or naked. Two thumbs and a cock up from me.

The movie’s currently the only thing saved on my Tivo and it’s always stuck on the scene where she gets ravaged on the beach in a somewhat decent sex scene for a non pornographic movie. A quality Babe of the Week if there ever was one.

Major props to my old friend the Babe Ninja for letting me know about this ultra fine piece of ass, the lovely Jessica Burciaga. She has one of the cutest and prettiest faces ever and a body that matches it in its excellence. She’s just drop dead gorgeous and about a million flavors of sexy and is just exactly what I look for in a girl.

This babe is definitely “my type” and was a shoe-in for Babe of the Week the second I saw her first photo. Of course, I’ve been a slack ass since then and am a few weeks behind, but I’m sure you’ll get over it once you start getting your stroke on to her beautiful photos inside.

I know I haven’t updated much and am two weeks behind on updating Babe of the Week and I apologize. I’ve just been really busy with girls, playing Resident Evil, drinking alcohol, more girls, playing SOCOM, more drinking, catching up on Battlestar Gallactica, and more girls and drinking the liquor. It’s been a wonderfully hectic last few weeks but I promise two new Babe of the Week updates before the end of the weekend. Oh, by the way, my first St Patty’s Day in Beantown was beyond amazing and the pimp hand was in full effect. Lots of beer, lots of hugs, lots of kisses, lots of digits and lots of fun.

Not only is she named after one of my favorite places to go, but the Israeli-born Goddess Bar Refaeli is also the most recent cover model for the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue. Both excellent honors and things to be proud of. Before that, she was probably best known as being Leo’s super hot girlfriend but I’m not going to hold that against her.

The bottom line is that this girl is drop dead gorgeous and is complete Spank Bank™ material. Naming her Babe of the Week was as easy as convincing myself to jerk off the second I wake up each and every morning. And for those that don’t really know me, I typically rub at least two out before before I fully open my eyes.

I hadn’t heard of her before today and have surprisingly never watched One Tree Hill, the TV series that Danneel Harris stars in, but I’ve quickly become a fan of her after seeing her amazing unclothed body in some movie she’s in called Ten Inch Hero. What’s funny is that I actually HAVE seen her nude before as she apparently showed off her assets in Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay but for whatever reason I never noticed enough to research or maybe I just wasn’t quite all “there” when I watched that movie the dozen or so times that I have…

All that doesn’t really matter, though. The point is that she’s really hot, has an amazingly fit and sexy body and is a prime Babe of the Week candidate. And while you’re checking her out, I think I’ll watch that movie again while completely sober and see if I recognize her.

When Danity Kane was first formed I had a bit of a crush on Aubrey O’Day. Thought she was cute and I just loved her incredibly fit and tight body. But the truth is I didn’t really follow DK or her much after that first season of the show. The fact that she did pose nude for Playboy obviously got my attention and I had to check her out unclothed the first chance I got.

The bad news is that I just don’t find her nearly as attractive anymore. I don’t know what it is but she seems so much more fake looking these days. I’m guessing it’s been a lot of plastic surgery, but I don’t follow the celeb gossip circuit so I don’t really know. Nevertheless, she’s still a very sexy girl and it’s nice to see her with her clothes off. Babe of the Week material for sure.

One of my faves on Rock of Love Bus is undoubtedly the sexy Latin beauty Brittanya O’Campo. She just gives off such a strange and intriguing vibe. She seems really sweet and innocent at times but at the same time you can’t help but feel that she’s a dirty whore that has STDs that haven’t been been named yet.

The real messed up thing is that even if she did have a plethora of STDs, the girl’s pretty enough and hot enough that you’d probably consider doing her any way and hope that penicillin is enough to fix whatever you pick up. And that, my friends, is what makes her one hell of a Babe of the Week.

The character she played in Nip/Tuck was kind of annoying, however, since AnnaLynne McCord is so freaking hot that I’d be more than willing to put up with her if she was just like that in real life. The hotness is what what has earned her my Babe of the Week because that’s pretty much the main thing that qualifies a girl.  And, let’s face it, the whole annoying thing would make for a phenomenal “hate fuck” candidate, as Hank Moody would say in Californication.

We’ll just call the Babe of the Week omissions for the past few weeks a holiday vacation. I had wanted to update on time each week, but I always ended up having something better to do — like play Fallout 3 or jerk off for the millionth time or take another nap. But now that I’m back to my real job from vacation, I figured I should also consider catching up with this.

The result of all this is that you get a trio of Babe of the Week’s this week! Sure, it’s only to catch me up, but you’re still getting a set of three smoking hot babes in a short amount of time. So, go ahead and check out Willa Ford, Lucy Hale, and Odette Yustman. And if you want to blame anything for my inconsistent updates, blame girls like them for occupying so much of my time!

Alright, so she isn’t really jailbait. Regardless, Madeline Zima’s character on Californication IS and there’s something scandously sexy about that. Throw in the facts that she has an amazing rack and her character on the show clearly loves the cock, and you have one mighty fine Babe of the Week-worthy piece of ass.

As I’ve mentioned previously, this show is filled with Spank Bank™-worthy fodder and, believe me, I’ve been stiffening quite a few socks and wash cloths thanks its inspirational message. There will inevitably be a plethora of future BotW’s that will come from this Showtime classic. And while on the topic of Showtime, there’s some hot naked Asian girl on TV now in some movie called Swingers Sex Party. Forgive me, while I see what it’s all about.

Okay, so she is not THE Gossip Girl, but she’s one of the bangable cuties on that show I’ve never watched even though a few chicks I know say it’s pretty damn good. However, I use that term bangable loosely because you can only legally do that in a few countries that aren’t mine.

Anyway, I first saw Taylor Momsen in the movie Underdog and that sparked my interest enough to google her and find out that she was an actress in that TV series Gossip Girl that I’ve heard some good things about but will likely never watch. She might be extremely young, but she is really nice on the eyes and does look fairly mature for her age, which makes her fair game for all the old dirty pervs out there. Enjoy her as my Babe of the Week!