The 100-hour mark hadn’t been hit in a while, though, thanks to the California OT laws that got passed for my last couple of years at VC and the fact that I just hadn’t really needed to here at Quick Hit. Sure, there’ve been some busy weeks but most topped out at 60-80 hours and a lot of it was split up between at the office and at home so it didn’t sting as much. Last week, I topped the 100 hour mark for work for the first time in a couple of years and while I’m honestly as exhausted as a whore on payday, it sort of feels good. The Hell should be over soon and even though I’m already at 29 hours through Monday and Tuesday, I’ll hopefully be getting back to normal hours soon and won’t have to hit the 100 hour mark again this week.

In a sick and twisted sort of way, all the work, the crazy hours and the sleep deprivation makes me feel more alive than normal. Either that, or maybe it’s the fact that all the work has made it hard to get shitfaced drunk and I haven’t gotten plastered in 15 days and counting… It could be a combination of both.

The latter is something that I’m definitely a fan of and as such, I consider it my civic duty to honor her as my Babe of the Week. It’s important to reward actresses, models and celebrities to do nice things like that so more in the future will keep doing it. I’m 100% certain that all of you reading are completely with me on this important agenda.

After a while, I decided to walk home and on the way I almost hit the Drunk Girl Lottery. First of all, the streets were packed with hordes of hotties all over the place, as it typically is around my “hood”. Upon turning around the corner onto State Street, I bumped into this gorgeous girl who practically jumped into my arms and started kissing me. And when she was done, she said “Take me home with you so we can fuck.”

Being a stone cold pimp who always has something smart and witty to say, I replied “Why?” like a big dumb idiot. My lack of game didn’t phase her and she just said it was her 21st birthday and I was her birthday present. I was completely ready to oblige and was hoping to see if she was down with some ATM action, but by this point her cock-blocking friends caught up to her and just yanked her off me and they told her she couldn’t leave with me and that they were taking her home. Oh, well, sucks to be me!

What I do get is the appeal of watching a video of a girl like Kendra getting plowed. The girl looks like she’d know what to do with a cock and her tape will undoubtedly have her perform substantially better than either Kim K or Paris (though, time will tell if she’s as talented as Pam). Never thought of her as that hot, but am eagerly anticipating the release of “Kendra Exposed”. Here are some sneak peaks from Vivid:

They say even if you’ve drank some of the infected water that it could be a week before you get sick, so even though everything seems fine now that I could have some massive diarrhea and flu-like symptoms or worse in the next week or so. I haven’t researched the medical viability of it yet, but I’m thinking one plan might be to overload my system with nothing but hard liquor for the next 7 days to try and kill all the bad stuff in my system before it can get to me. Sounds like a plan!

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What’s even more fucked up was the fact that I was only startled for a couple of seconds before I got out of bed, picked up a hacksaw and started cutting the body up. After getting it in a bunch of manageable pieces, I calmly wrapped it up tightly in the plastic, ala Dexter, pulled out a hockey equipment bag from under my bed and stuffed the body inside it.

After doing this, I cleaned myself up, put the bag around my shoulders and headed downstairs where the doorman to my building opened the front door and said, “Looks like another late night at the rink, Mr. Zdyrko?”, as if this was a familiar occurrence that I’ve done plenty of times before. I then took the hockey bag with the body in it and put it in the trunk of my Lexus before driving off to dump it in some lake outside of Boston.

After dumping the body, I started driving back to my apartment and began having a bunch of flashbacks of other people I’ve killed and dumped. Next thing I know, I wake up in my bed, this time completely startled and frightened about everything that just went down. I immediately checked under my bed for the hockey bag and didn’t see that, a body, a hacksaw or any sign of blood anywhere (thankfully). The entire ordeal was so freaky because I felt like it was 100% real and despite the immensely fucked up things I was doing in it, I wasn’t the least bit disturbed.

It looks like a heart attack waiting to happen, but could also be quite tasty as long as the chicken isn’t all dried up. I may have to try one out…but just once. Any more than that and I’ll surely find myself topping 400 lbs before I know it and end up in one of those giant piano-sized caskets that was on that Jamie Oliver show. Luckily, for myself, my heart and my arteries, I’m broke for the weekend and the only food I have to eat is a bunch of broccoli, carrots, and Swiss chard. Nom noms.

It only needs a little more than 250,000 fans to top a million and since the baby’s not due till August there’s still a lot of time. If you have a Facebook, do the world a favor and become a fan now!

This past Winter Olypmics featured a ton of eye-candy in the Curling ranks and I was having probably trying to pick one to feature. I couldn’t make up my mind, so I went with the trio of Melanie Robillard (Germany), Madeleine Dupont (Denmark), & Ludmila Privivkova (Russia). So, they’re all my Babe of the Week. Apologies to some of their hot and worthy teammates or competitors from other countries that didn’t quite make the cut for my podium.

1. Win 4 National Championships, 4 Heisman Trophies, and finish my career as a starting quarterback for the University of Miami Hurricanes with a perfect 48-0 record. FAIL
2. Win 6 Super Bowl championships, 6 league MVPs, 1 Rookie of the Year, and have two 19-0 seasons as Quarterback of the Miami Dolphins. FAIL
3. Win 2 NBA Championships playing for the Boston Celtics as a hobby during my six year reign of terror on the NFL. FAIL
4. Win 2 NHL Stanley Cups with the Philadelphia Flyers in the same two year period I won the NBA titles. FAIL
5. Win 2 World Series titles, have two 75+ HR seasons, and pitch 12 perfect games while playing for the Baltimore Orioles during those same super busy years. FAIL
6. After getting tired of the main American sports, play for the US men’s soccer team and lead them to a World Cup while scoring 3 goals per game and shattering numerous records. FAIL
7. Retire from sports by the age of 29 and start my acting and singing career that would see me win numerous Oscars and Grammys. FAIL
8. Have a threesome with supermodels Cindy Crawford and Niki Taylor. FAIL
9. Have a threesome with then teen pop stars Debbie Gibson and Tiffany. FAIL
10. Become a millionaire! FAIL

Alright, so maybe I dreamed a little too big when I was growing up. But while the ambitious goals of a young dreamer failed to fully materialize, the life I have led has been quite amazing and is only getting better. I’ve been all around the globe, have met some amazing people over the years and get to make video games for a living. Plus, I still have a shot at #10 and while I wouldn’t even want #8 or #9 anymore, I have lucked my way into a couple of threesomes and still have my hopes up for my current supermodel threesome goal of Adriana Lima and Alessandra Ambrosio or my teen pop star duo ambition of Miley Cyrus and Selena Gomez (waiting till they’re 18, of course).  Happy Birthday to me.

Those mysteries in life aside, I must say that I’m extremely disappointed with the guys so far this year. They all seem to suck and I’m not talking about in the Ryan Seacrest kind of way. None seem even remotely on the same level as Adam Lambert or that Chris guy that beat him last season cause America still hates the gays. Maybe one or two might step it up, but I’m not seeing it so far.

The good news is that I now get to watch Lost and Blue Mountain State without any commercial interruptions!

Although, I must say that the company’s latest “revolution” has left me feeling a bit like I did back when I saw this really HOT chick walk into the bathroom at the End Up back in SF and then watching her whip out her cock and pee in the trough urinals right next to me — confused. As a technological gadget, the iPad seems cool. It’s like a giant iPhone without the cell phone part, yet smaller and more portable than the Macbook I own and love. I just don’t know why I’d ever want to own one other than to have the latest gadget to fool around with. It’s too big to carry around everywhere, so it’s not like I’m going to carry it with me at all times like my iPhone. And it’s just not powerful or functional enough to replace my Macbook when I’m at home or on trips.

The only place I could see me really wanting to use it would be on airplanes, where it would make a better book reader or movie player than either the iPhone or Macbook — but I barely fly once a year of late. Other than that, the only reason I could see getting it would be for the “cool” factor and I’m not sure if that’s enough for me in my current financial dilemma. I do have some very “revolutionary” ideas for it, but will wait on posting them as they could be HUGE and want to see if I can get a patent first.

Her personality can also be designed to maker her super wild or as frigid as the Great Lakes in winter (I’m assuming this works perfectly for wannabe rapists). She laughs, she snores, she talks, she can take three dicks at once, she loves, she hates and she never has a headache. And the best thing about Roxxxy is that she’ll only cost you between $7 & $9k, which is substantially cheaper than a real girlfriend and not as big of a dent in the wallet as going to prison for some sexually deviant act would be.

If you’re a freak-a-leak and are itching to buy Roxxxy or just interested in seeing another clue that humanity is on its last legs, check out this very informative video from Youtube.