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"Fuck this game!"

- Dane Cook

Monday, March 31, 2003

Big new batch of eBay goodies --
I doubt that any of the latest stuff is of interest to any of you. But since I've made wrong assumptions like this in the past, I figured that I'd once again share with all of you my latest batch of stuff that I'm selling on eBay. I don't want to link to every one of them because there are 10 total items up for sale, so just check out the listing of all my current auctions if you want to have a look. Basically, I've put up some old electronic hardware that I no longer use and a bunch of football jerseys and shirts that are too big for me now and too valuable just to give to Goodwill.

Jolly new day --
It's been hella nice these past few days here in San Francisco. We've actually been having weather that people might actually identify with California even though it's not normal for these parts. Sunny and warm and lots of girls looking hella fine in warm weather clothing. I love it. Sadly, I'm stuck in an office all day that's FREEZING cold. I have to bust out my own heater and it's still cold because the AC is blowing down right on my head. Anyway, the "Dear Dave" has been updated and it's a fairly large one. Kind of like Christina Aguilera's large lips that you'll get a look at if you check out the update.

Sunday, March 30, 2003

A good week --
This was one of the better weight loss weeks in a while, as I've dropped another 4.5 lbs thus putting me at a slim 259.0 lbs. My total in overall weight lost now comes in at 127.5 lbs.

On a related front, I made myself extremely happy digging through my closest yesterday. First, I tried on all the old high school shit that I still have -- things that I won't throw away like my letterman's jacket and various football shirts -- and they all fit better now than they ever did back in school.

Second, I tried on a bunch of the jerseys and dress shirts that I bought last summer. HUGE. Like massive. The jerseys, which were always baggy, now hang almost all the way down to my knees. And when I hold my arms out, the sides extend like three inches to each side of my stomach. Even though I spent a combined $450 on those four jerseys and two dress shirts, I don't mind the fact that I got less than a year out of each of them. It feels good, actually.

The only things in my closet that I don't fit are a bunch of large Incredible Crisis t-shirts, an XL Gran Turismo 3 t-shirt and this awesome XL Vib Ribbon button shirt (Doug Perry rules for getting this while he was in Europe). Those are my next big goals because I would love to wear the Vib Ribbon shirt around.

Gold mine --
I also found a pot of gold in my closet, but it's not the kind of gold that will make me rich financially. It's the kind that might prove to be good fodder for future updates to the site. I found a ton of old report cards, certificates (I got crazy amounts of these through school and I didn't even know I had them), the felony conviction paperwork, the doctor's report on my diabetes, and other miscellaneous stuff. I'm not really sure how much I'll be able to do with these, but there's at least one very early report card that I definitely will scan and make available on the site.

Saturday, March 29, 2003

My home theater system --
I'm selling yet another one of my posesions in my never-ending quest to get out of debt -- my Pioneer HTD-510 Home Theater System. It's a 5-disc DVD changer with a built-in DTS and Dolby Digital 5.1 receiver and it comes with six surround sound speakers. I'm all asking is a mere $300. Since it's a huge and very bulky item, it's only available to those in my local area via Craig's List.

An older, wiser and more thrifty Dave Z --
A fair amount of you have been asking me how exactly I've been able to knock out so much of my massive credit card debt over the course of the past six or so months, so I've decided to share some of the changes I've done that have helped me out financially. And, no, I have not been given any sort of big fat raises, I have not been supplementing my normal income with male prostitution and I have not slipped back into my felony ways to earn extra cash. I've simply started making smart choices with my money and have cut back on the things that I didn't necessarily need to have. Here's a basic breakdown.

• Selling crap that I no longer need or use on eBay, Craig's List and BRESoftware.com. To date, I've netted about $2,756 in sales via these areas. With the latest batch of stuff, this number should pass $3,000 shortly.
• First reduced and eventually eliminated cable TV. This was difficult because I really miss it now that it's gone, but it makes perfect sense. Especially nowadays, as I'm only home for a couple of waking hours per day. Was paying $68.60/month for Cable TV and am now paying $0. This saves me $823.20 per year.
• Cut back on my cell phone plan because I wasn't coming close to my full minute usage. Was paying $65.80/month and am now paying $32.85/month (signed up for another 12-months, so my minutes are actually as high as before). This saves me about $395.40 per year.
• Negotiated a new monthly payment for my SBC Yahoo! DSL service and signed a new 12-month commitment. Was paying $49.99 for this and am now paying $34.99. This saves me about $180 per year.
• Downgraded my phone plan from The Works to Saver 60 and am not using any sort of extras like Caller ID. This saves me about $10 per month and $120 per year.
• Using FasTrak instead of paying tolls each day. Saves me $1 every time I cross the bridge, which amounts to a $312 savings.
• Started BFL in order to improve my health. I was spending about $400/month on groceries and $250/month on diabetic supplies including insulin, test strips and needles. I'm now spending about $200/month on both food and supplements and $0 on diabetic supplies. This is a savings of about $5,760 over the course of a year.
• Not included in the grocery budgedt, I went from drinking diet sodas (and a lot of them) to drinking only water. I was paying about $20/month on diet sodas before, I'm now paying $0/month for beverages. That's $240 per year I'm saving.
• Stopped assuming "DVD Tuesday" meant that I HAVE to buy a new DVD every week. In 2002, I spent $1,800 on DVDs. I'm on pace to spend less than $300 this year on the same things. That's a savings of $1,500.
• David Smith pays half of the main household bills for gas/electricity, long distance, garbage, and water, while I was paying for all of them myself during the pre-Smith era, including a lot of other people's long distance calls. That saves me about $1,018/year based on the bills for those utilities in the first three months of this year. And if you factor in that the bills in these categories are much smaller in the Smith-era (he doesn't have a computer, only has a little TV, is at work during the bulk of the day, and we only have two people living here for the most part instead of three), I'm actually now paying about $1,300 less per year on these same utilities.

If you add that all up, the changes that have happened over the course of the past six to twelve months are saving me more than $10,000 per year. Add to that the $2,756 I've made off of sales of stuff I don't need and you can see how I've been able to nearly eliminate all of my debt that has been haunting me for the past decade of my life. Just think about it...by this summer I can be in the 220s and completely out of debt. Not too shabby. I'm definitely excited about it. Being 30 ain't all that bad to tell you the truth.

Thursday, March 27, 2003

A relatively light-hearted "Dear Dave" --
Not nearly as emotional as the last few updates. This "Dear Dave" is a little more fun and comical than what we've had over the past few weeks. Anyway, give it a read if you will. I don't do this for my own personal amusement!

Oh no! I bought another game! --
Don't worry. I haven't gone back down the evil path of debt and spending money unwisely. I just picked up a used copy of Klonoa 2 Lunatea's Veil for PlayStation 2. This is one of my personal favorites on the system and I can't believe that I had never picked up a copy back when I was still at IGNPS2. When I saw it at EB today for $10, I couldn't resist picking it up. As it stands, VF4 Evolution is my only guilty-pleasure purchase of late since Zelda was purchased with store credit that I had built up by trading in crappy games.

You will also see Dark Cloud 2 and .hack Infection: Part 1 on my PS2 list, as The Reverend went ahead and gave me his copies of the game that I had been playing. Ain't he a sweetie? My collection for the PS2 is now up to 70 relatively strong titles. It dwarfs in numbers compared to what I had before I started selling stuff away, but it's stronger in its current state than it was before the fire sale.

Wednesday, March 26, 2003

Get some custome colored GameCubes! --
It seems that our friend Sam Bishop has joined in on the eBay fun and has put up a couple of custom colored Nintendo GameCube systems from Color Consoles. Both units have been colored and are new GameCube consoles that come with a US/Japan region mod switch that allows you to play both US and Japanese GameCube software titles. Here are links to the two auctions if you're interested:

Diamond Silver/Ruby Red Nintendo GameCube
Saphire Blue/Diamond Silver Nintendo GameCube

For those not yet in the know, Sam is now the man running things over at Color Consoles, so keep that place in mind if you ever want a system of yours re-done with a unique new paint job. I'm thinking about getting one of my PS2's colored whenever I have some extra cashola lying around. Leaning towards getting it done up in Diamond Silver, but haven't yet made up my mind.

Tuesday, March 25, 2003

A powerful "Dear Dave" update --
Okay, it's not really all that powerful. But it does have a letter from IGN's former "Best. Intern. Ever!" Marc "Pokemon of the Day Guy" Nix, so it's definitely cool. We also talk some politics, Xenosaga, babes and the typical stuff you can expect in your average "Dear Dave" update. Feel free to email me about VF4 Evo or The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker because I'd love to talk about either of those games.

Girls Gone Wild! --
Three of my four Girls Gone Wild VHS tapes are still up on Amazon.com, but I've lowered the price down to $9.99 each. If you're interested, you should check out the following three links:

Girls Gone Wild: Best of Spring Break
Girls Gone Wild: Best of Mardi Gras
Girls Gone Wild: College Co-Eds Mardi Gras

What pisses me off is that my auction for my set of four had gotten up to over $40 with three days remaining on eBay before they shut it down because it wasn't in the "Adult" section. Then after putting it in the Adult section, it failed to get bid on after being up for five full days. Now on Amazon.com, it's been over a month and I've only managed to sell one of them. Boo!

Monday, March 24, 2003

She's mixed. I'm mixed. Can I make it anymore obvious?

And to any women out there, you don't need to feel left out. This babe surely turns you on as much as us guys, so feel free to flick your bean with reckless abandon while checking out Jaymee's Babe of the Week pictures.

A couple of triple-A titles --
I'm not supposed to be buying any non-essentials these days, but I went ahead and got The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker for GameCube and Virtua Fighter 4: Evolution for PlayStation 2. Played a bit of both of them tonight and am very pleased with my purchases. So far, I've ventured about two or three hours into Zelda and about 30-40 matches into VF4 Evo with "Z-Sarah". My only bitch about either game is that I have to go to sleep and then go to work tomorrow. It's just not fair!

I'm getting old --
I don't know if it's because I'm now 30 years old or because I just can't take certain foods anymore because I'm not used to them. But certain very greasy foods are making me ill whenever I eat them. Yesterday was a free day and I decided to eat at this BBQ place down in Santa Clara as Smith and I were down in the South Bay checking out Fry's Electronics and other stores. As I'm sure you've gathered already, the food made me INCREDIBLY sick.

All I had was a BBQ beef sandwhich with some potato salad and it made my stomach hurt more than it's ever hurt before (including when my appendix went bad). It was so awful that I had to get Smith to drive us home while I puked and almost passed out in the car. Very fun stuff. Feeling better now, but I won't be eating anything like that anymore.

Sunday, March 23, 2003

Still going... --
Despite my thursday night stumble, I still managed a loss for the week of 2.5 lbs, as I'm now checking in at 263.5 lbs. It took a lot of laxatives, glycerin suppositories, enimas, and special forces work by my fingers into my anal cavity, but the weight came off. If all goes well, I might be able to get into the 250s by my weigh-in next week.

Saturday, March 22, 2003

Yep. Them guns are from Texas.

No longer a virgin... --
...but still a babe. That's why Jessica Simpson is the newest Babe of the Week! Given my teen pop star fetish, you have probably been wondering why she wasn't given this honor a long time ago. Well, I don't really know why I passed her up for such a long time. Maybe it's something about her giving it up to some boy band member instead of me. Yes, I'm very bitter about that. But, I can't blame her, however. If she had me first, it'd only be downhill for the rest of her life. As is, she might be able to work her way up the ladder and save the best for last.

A few stepbacks --
For the second time since I started this whole diet thing, I actually strayed away from the path a few days ago. I think it was the stress, anger and worry caused by the war and the stupid anti-war protesters, but I don't really know. I cheated Thursday night by eating a couple of slices of my brother's pizza he had left out. I guess I could also blame him for always ordering pizza on an almost nightly basis when he knows it's hard for me to resist (could maybe blame my parents for all my diet failures growing up because I always had "bad" kinds of food around me at all times), but I won't. I just screwed up. I'm sure it'll happen again, but I won't let it get me down and I'll just use it as fuel to inspire me to stay on course harde.

I'm still expecting to drop a tiny bit of week for the week or lose nothing at the very worst. I actually had to head back for another check-up with my doctor yesterday afternoon because he wanted to re-test my thyroid because he thinks the medication may not be working as well anymore. I should find out what's up next week. He might have to get me on actual thyroid hormones. We'll see.

Friday, March 21, 2003

Support our troops --
I don't care whether you're "for" or "against" this war, but it's time to unite as a country and support our troops. Set your political views aside and show our men and women in the armed services who are risking their lives for our country that we are fully behind them. If you are against the war and the Bush administration's decision to wage war, just make your voice heard after our boys are back home.

The next presidential election is just a year away, so you'll have an excellent chance to voice your displeasure and make your point heard at that time. Protests right now, with our troops in battle, can only hurt things and won't do anything to help stop the war or help bring them home safely. Disruptive protests that include property damage and the stopping of traffic and the infringing on the rights of others is just stupid in general and should never be done in the first place.

It's kind of weird to hear about nothing but protests here in the States against our own country while Iraqi citizens have been already seen chanting "Ameriki! Ameriki!" and saying things like, "Saddam Hussein is no good. Saddam Hussein a butcher."

Pretty calm "Dear Dave" --
So far, the responses have been pretty well-mannered. I guess war for you guys isn't as big of an issue as college football or videogames. Maybe if the idiot anti-war protesters (the ones causing havoc, not the ones that are just against the war) and people like Osama Bin Laden and Saddamm Hussein would play some videogames they'd get their priorities in order and the world would be much better because of it. Anyway, amidst the war, I'm still bringing you "Dear Dave".

Thursday, March 20, 2003

Protesters are fucking morons --
I think I'm living in the worst of all the 50 states. If California were to just fall off the face of the Earth and all of its population instantly killed, the United States of America and the entire world would be a better place. Yes, that would mean I would be dead, but it'd be a good trade off and I'd be willing to die for the betterment of my country. For every single intelligent person living in California like myself, I bet there's 5 million idiots that deserve to die.

It's okay at protest the war if you feel that's the best thing to do. However, once you start blocking traffic and infringing on the rights of others that's going too far. You do NOT have the right to infringe on the rights of others like that. I beg of you to PLEASE lay down in the middle of a road that I'm driving on. Because, I will run your ass over to show my full support of our President and his decision to try and rid the world of an evil dictator. We both win in that situation. I get to show my point by killing groups of you, and your value as a protester is increased tenfold because protesters that die are more powerfull than ones that are alive.

Here's another idea -- go out and do what that dumb ass did yesterday on the Golden Gate bridge. Read off some anti-War statement and then jump off the bridge to your death. Honestly, hearing about that almost made me change my opinion about the war. Just think...if one man jumping to his death could almost get me to change my mind...what would happen if a million of you morons did it? That would be a POWERFUL message that neither I nor the President could ignore. So, do it! Jump off the Golden Gate bridge in protest! Do it for your cause! Do it in support of an evil dictator that murders, rapes and tortures his own people! Do it in support of a man who has stated on record numerous times that he would attack the United States the first chance he got! Do it for a country that supplies weapons and money to the terrorists that killed numerous Americans in DC and NYC on 9/11! Do it! I promise that it'll change my opinion on this whole situation.

Tuesday, March 18, 2003

Today, yesterday, who cares? --
Okay, I updated the "Dear Dave" column yesterday but forgot to make note of it on the main page. I'd make some kind of tree falling in the forest analogy with nobody around, but that would be stupid. I hate that damn saying or whatever the hell it is. I'd rather just saying "monkey jizz" or "I masturbate" and hope I get a chuckle or two out of it.

I lost David Smith! --
Don't get worried, The Reverend isn't missing. He just informed me yesterday that I've lost his weight on this BFL diet. Smith says he weighs a hair over 120 lbs and I've lost approximately 120.5 lbs in the 25 weeks I've been on the program. I've also lost more than 90% of my Babe of the Week girls weigh. The heaviest, based on the information I've been able to gather, is Britney Spears and she's at around 135 lbs. I have 15 more to go before I reach her weight in pounds lost.

Sunday, March 16, 2003

My eBay addiction --
For most of my life I've been addicted to spending money that I didn't have and now it seems that I'm addicted to selling stuff that I no longer need. I guess it's a good thing because it's helping me get out of debt slowly but surely. I figure you know the drill by now -- I have a bunch of new things up for sale on eBay. If you're interested, bid away. If your'e not, well, you can always jerk off more to last week's Babe. Don't forget, I still have a TV stand up on Craig's List for $75 OBO, but that's only for locals.

Lightest. Dave Z. Ever! --
Alright, "ever" isn't really the right word here. My then 90 lb mother didn't somehow manage to give birth to some behemoth 268 lb baby back in 1973. So, I've definitely weighed less than I do right now at other times in my life. However, I am now at the lowest weight that I've ever been at my current height of about 5' 11", which is 266.0 lbs.

The last time I weighed less than this was in the 8th grade, I believe. That earliest weight I have records of was for my physical that I had to get done before starting freshmen football for Caesar Rodney High School back in August of 1987 where I tipped the scales at a rather hefty 272.5 lbs. It was pretty common for me during my early years to put on an average of 20 lbs every summer vacation between school years, so I'm guessing I was probably in the 250s during my 8th grade year. But, I was not yet at my current height at that time, so I am currently the lightest I've EVER been at 5' 11" tall.

Anyway, I've lost a total of 54.0 lbs during the 12 weeks of my second full BFL cycle that just ended today. And I've lost a grand total of 120.5 lbs since the very beginning. I've definitely come a long way, but here's where it really starts to get fun because I am entering unchartered territory here. Every single pound I lose from now onward will be a new record of sorts and it's all starting to really excite me. Just think about it, come this June I could be weighing somewhere in the 220s, I could be completely out of debt and might hook up with Christina Aguilera back stage at her San Jose concert. It's all possible!

.hack steps up to the plate --
I've chosen .hack as my next game to finish and I've just watched the anime movie that came with it and played for maybe an hour into it. Seems pretty cool for the most part. My only bitch is that the camera system is ass, but I guess it's being authentic to true MMORPG form. Nonetheles, I'm enjoying it so far.

Saturday, March 15, 2003

For Sale: Black TV Stand --
No takers for the Dreamcast demos, so they're off to the landfills. But, I do have something else I'm hoping to sell -- a black television stand / entertainment center. I've put it up on Craig's List for $75 OBO. Just as was the case with the 27" TV that I just sold off to a good friend, IGN's Chris Carle, if you want it you'll have to pick it up from my crib here in San Francisco.

I'm also considering selling my 5-disc DVD player / DTS receiver that EA hooked me up with for seeing some DTS presentation, but I'm not sure if I want to let go of that just yet.

Anyway, my debt is now under $6,000 and if I'm able to keep from spending a single penny on anything that isn't CRUCIAL to get by, it's entirely possible that I could pay off my final credit card bill by mid-June. Anything I can sell will help things out even further, but I'm starting to run out of things that I'm willing to part with.

Friday, March 14, 2003

Want a couple of Dreamcast demos?--
I've got a couple of demos for the Dreamcast that I'm ready to throw away, but will sell to the first person that wants them for $4 ($3.85 for Priority Mail shipping and $0.15 for the cost of the package). Email me if you want them. If nobody does, they'll find themselves in some landfill with the rest of the Dreamcasts that nobody wanted.

The demos are -- Official Sega Dreamcast Magazine November 1999 and Sega Dreamcast Generator. They have stuff like VF 3tb, Dynamite Cop, TrickStyle, Toy Commander, Ready 2 Rumble, Power Stone, Sonic Adventure and other random titles. I'd put them up on eBay, but figure I'd only lose money on them since I'd have to pay the fee to post them. I'd rather toss them than pay for someone to take them.

Thursday, March 13, 2003

Buy my crap on eBay! --
My Lot of 11 PlayStation 2 games for sale on eBay hasn't gotten any new bids in the past 24 hours and there's currently less than seven hours remaining on it. Not looking good for dirrty ole me. I'm hoping for $15 per game and it looks like I'll be lucky to get $10. Bid if you're interested. If you're not, then go lick your own asshole ya damn monkey!

Tuesday, March 11, 2003

Politics are annoying --
After today's "Dear Dave" I think I'm going to just avoid any more talk of anything that's the least bit political. Or just share my viewpoints and don't give anyone a chance to share theirs. Things will work out nicely that way. It is my stupid little website, anyway. I gotta be in control of at least one thing in my life, right?

Monday, March 10, 2003

Baby got back!.

Viva la Vida! --
Vida Guerra is the new Babe of the Week. If you don't know why, then you probably didn't check out that ass to the right, yet. I'll let her booty do the talkin' and just keep my mouth shut.

More items up for sale --
I had really wanted to stop with the eBay sales, but I'm really close to being able to pay off my final past due credit card bill, so I'm trying to do everything I can do to come up with the money. Therefore, I've went ahead and put up another Lot of 11 PlayStation 2 games for sale on eBay. Please bid if you're interested in any of the included games or if you're some rich freak who just wants to pay off my bills for me -- if you want a blow job instead of my games for the same price, I'm willing to negotiate.

I'm also putting up one of my three TVs up for sale locally on Craig's List. It's a 27" Sony Trinitron television and I'm hoping to get $300 for it. It might be asking for much, but I figure it can't hurt to ask. I'm only selling this locally, so don't email unless you can pick it up from my house in San Francisco.

Sunday, March 9, 2003

Baby steps --
Only lost about 2 lbs in the past week, as I'm currently tipping the scales at 270.5 lbs. My total in lost weight is now approximately 116.5 lbs. Hopefully I'll be able to reach the magical 268.0 lbs milestone by my next weekly weigh-in, as it'll be pretty kick ass to close out my second full BFL cycle at my lowest adult weight ever. If I keep this up, it won't be long before girls will be taking sly flicks of their beans at the mere site of my soon-to-be irresistible figure.

Saturday, March 8, 2003

Working Weekends --
Decided to take a little break from some weekend work at the office to update "Dear Dave" with some new emails and such (including a new picture of me with "Mike loves Eugene" on my chest). Now I just gotta figure out what game to start playing next now that I'm finished with Xenosaga (though, I do plan on spending some time with XenoCards). I'm thinking about taking on either .hack, Breath of Fire or Dark Cloud 2 next, but I'm not sure. I'm actually looking for a short one if at all possible, so at least two of those seem to fit that bill. I welcome any suggestions.

Friday, March 7, 2003

Xenosaga rocks my world --
Wow. What an amazing game. I'm obviously riding on a bit of a "just beat the game" high, but I think it's safe to say that Xenosaga has already solidified itself as one of my all-time favorite RPGs. The story and presentation are unmatched in the world of videogames and it was capped off brilliantly with a very rewarding and fulfilling ending.

My only complaint about the game is that I'm done with it and will have to wait a long time before I can see how the storyline completely unfolds. It's almost as bad as the wait was for Return of the Jedi after The Empire Strikes Back ended with Han Solo frozen in carbonite.

If you haven't done so already and are into console RPGs, I strongly recommend picking up this game. There are a lot of cinemas, but they don't really get in the way of gameplay as much as you'd think because they are so extremely well done. I had read that there were cut scenes that were timed at upwards of 50 minutes, but I honestly couldn't tell you which ones were that long because there wasn't a single one that I encountered that felt long. KOS-MOS ownz you!

Wednesday, March 5, 2003

The cruel world we live in --
Had a strange birthday. Started it off with talk about living and ended it with news of death. Shortly before leaving work this evening I learned that my grandfather had passed away. It really hurts because he was someone that I really wanted to surprise with the "new and improved" me when I had time to head back east after finishing up on 2K4. I know that he would've been very proud of me. Not-so-happy birthday to me!

I'm still alive! --
The good news is that the fortune tellar [sic] with the fucked up teeth and bad breath is wrong, because I have lived to see my 30th birthday. The bad news is that I'm now 30 years old, thus making my teenage pop star fetish infinitely more disturbing. Hey, I'm still less perverted than some 40 year old lusting after some 18 year old female entertainer, so it could be worse, right?

In honor of my 30th birthday and to celebrate the fact that I'm still among the living, I've decided to give you guys a large update to "Dear Dave". I really know how to celebrate, don't I? A fun fact for you -- I'm lighter right now as a 30 year old than I ever was in all of my 20s. If all goes well, within a couple of weeks I'll weigh less than I ever have at my current height. Another thing to ponder -- do you think I would have made it to my 30th birthday if I hadn't started BFL? I was 386.5 lbs and growing at the time and was experiencing nightly chest pains and diabetic complications up the ying-yang. Ah, I guess we'll never know...

Tuesday, March 4, 2003

My final hours --
You'd think that one would have some exciting things planned for the final day of his life, but not me! Instead of partying like a madman, going on some killing spree or finding and raping Jessica Alba -- like a normal guy in my situation would do -- my only plan for my final hours is to try and see if I can finish up Xenosaga. A stone-cold geek and hardcore gamer to the end, I guess.

I'm not even sure if I'm close to the end of the game, yet, but it does feel like I've entered the final dungeon. I could easily be mistaken, however, because I'm only about 26 hours in and none of my characters have even reached level 30. We'll see. I'd consider it a big plus to have beaten Xenosaga before biting the bullet. So, wish me luck! And it was nice knowing you all. It's been a great run, but as they say...all good things must come to an end!

Monday, March 3, 2003

Lesbians rock!

This chick loves that chick --
And we are all better people because of it. This week's Babe(s) of the Week is the teenage Russian lesbian duo that was first introduced to me several moons ago by none other than David Toole. They were still underage at this time, so it proves once and for all that Toole is a major pervert.

Two days left to live --
I better beat Xenosaga soon because I only have a couple of days left to live since I was told by a fortune tellar that I would never live to see my 30th birthday. Either that, or the constant masturbation will result in blindness soon and I'll be alive on my 30th birthday, but be unable to see anymore. Either way, it's not a good thing.

Sunday, March 2, 2003

Still going --
The weight continues to drop off at a steady pace. My morning weigh in saw me tip the scales at 272.5 lbs, which means I've now lost approximately 114.5 lbs since starting BFL. It's kind of weird to me because that number just seems so enormous, yet the change doesn't seem nearly as drastic. In fact, many people that don't realize that I'm on some kind of a diet can't tell that I've lost any weight -- the reaction is often more like "something looks different about you, what'd you do?" than, "Holy crap! You look like you lost more than 100 lbs!". I'm guessing the physical transformation with the next 50 lbs will be much more noticable, so I'm excited about the coming months.

Saturday, March 1, 2003

Don't blame me, blame Xenosaga --
It seems that it's the American way these days to blame everyone and everything but yourself, so that's what I'm going to do. I'm blaming this babe-less week on the fact that Xenosaga: Episode I Der Wille zur Macht was released. I'm only about 12 1/2 hours in -- work schedule means that anything more than two hours per day of game playing time cuts into sleep -- but I'm enjoying the hell out of it.

The story is unbelievably good and the cut scenes are so brilliantly orchestrated and well done that I don't mind the fact that there's so much of them. I'm still way too early in the game to really make the comparison, but if you were to ask me based on what I've played so far, I'd say that I like this better than Final Fantasy X. Hopefully the story will hold up throughout the entire game.

For those that could care less about my excuses, I'll have a new babe(s) for you on Monday.

Getting rid of that morning wood --
You ever wake up with morning wood so hard that you just had to start rubbing it raw before you even fully opened your eyes? Then after countless minutes of stoking it like a madman with only minutes left to live, you just about give up because the lactic acid build up in your forearm has become too painful to take before pushing yourself to whack even harder? And then when you finally are able to bring yourself to climax you finally realize that you just urinated all over yourself because that was the cause of the morning wood? Never happened to me, either.

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